bird in the desert

life among

thistles and thorns

and rocks that sigh

beneath dreaming reptiles

the palest shades of green 

gold and beige

and fresh picked bundles of sage

slow drifting clouds

linger and long

to give up their tears 

for the thirst of another

for her

parched soul 

heart like a rose

the only red flower here

living on dust

and heat 

and the indigo night

breathing in stars

then sending out light

a maker

she is 

a baker of 

love

of hope

and of magic

the sweetness 

of living

unbridled heart
loving and giving

she kneads the

warm golden earth

 beneath her

she punches it down

then lets it rise

she knows which way 

the crow flies

super moon

she came this close before

to look more closely in horror

or

to deliver light....i'm not sure

the year Gandhi said good bye and.... "oh God"

she is back now

and 

she is full

and she is wondering

and watchful

guiding our fear to someplace 

warmer.....safer.....brighter

 .....i'd like to hope

   

like a mother with a flashlight

bursting open doors upon children
fighting in the darkness

shining a spotlight on our battles

forcing us to see the wrong

and the good

within us all

to look more clearly 

into the eyes of our rivals

and to not look away

on monday

on MOON day

may you bask in her healing aura

bathe in her radiance 

may you

use the gift of light

to see more clearly

the truth that lives within
the collective heart

of

womankind

smoothie

is it just me

or do you also not know

where i end and you

begin

most of life spent inside

looking out

ponderous and pining 

for what the others

have

how they make friends

like it's nothing

while i'm over here

losing myself

in your 

kool-aid

drowning

 in your

charismatic sea

 burping up the bullshit

of someone else's autonomy

  wanting only

to just be

....me

but still standing next

 to you

big brown eyes

when I try to type "eyes" it keeps coming up "yes"

just like the word I stumbled on

when you said I love you 

then asked me if I loved you too

so many many years ago

the stumbling was not  because I didn't

no

it was because I had no idea why you would

love me....that is

that was the moment I saw myself unlimited

someone more than who I thought I was 

and more like who I wanted to be

you never withheld your love

and from that I have struggled and grown

...made mistakes

...probably said wrong things

but I learned to be a mom

not the one who made you

but the one who loves you like she did

brotherly love

a boy was filled with golden light
at one time
and another

sometimes it poured like honey-real sweet and nice

other times it shot like arrows
right through my sad little heart

a smile too big to keep quiet
so eager to share

perfect teeth
chocolatey hair
and eyes with fire behind them
quelled far too many times

we were all so young and small back then

and you....
we thought you'd set the world on fire
but it was resting on your shoulders
this whole time

and boy did it get heavy

back then you had
the biggest dreams
and passion that could burn the sea
compassion like no other

what happened to that light

i know

shhh....shhhh....

i know....

hey..that's the way it goes
when you wear the hand-me-down genes of a Narcissist

heart's always tangled in your sleeves
tongue tied and toughened

brother---I miss you

i miss our talks
your knowing without saying
big smiles and laughter when we'd gather

the memories are all i have
and longings for a future

where you are

-------------------------------

when leaves dry up and turn the color of the appliances of our childhood
.......i think of you

when I see little boys with big smiles and big dreams and big hearts
full of hope
.......i think of you

when I see random acts of kindness between perfect strangers
.......i think of you


hey.......i think of you

Naked

she sits at the bottom 

of an alabaster well

feeling piggish and unworthy

pink skin twisted into

knots like flesh noodles

or flushed and bloated intestines

hair raising as warmth fades

and chill wraps its arms around her

afraid they might

look down upon her

and see only ugliness

an exposed and bleeding 

heart 

too open

invisible cuts

deep enough to lose herself 

forever 

a colossal fear of life

that wears an ugly mask

of anger

.......but then again

a soft and quiet love 
that blooms so bright and far
it could swallow

up your pride and make you love her

again

Afterglow

sit for a spell

and quietly watch

  emerald boughs

 bend glowing 

streams of
 light

to their whim

and softly

jaded fingers 

fondle dancing clouds

of shimmering dust

as tender blushing buds 

break through neon cocoons

against a blue sky

and

just like you

they ache for it.....

the heat that feeds the heart

and roots

and sends shoots of life into the night